Assault Walker Texas Ranger . My first attempt at a Mech...be gentle! . Okay, fine! It's got nothing to do with Chuck Norris. But hey, made ya look. So now that you're here...It seems to me that no Lego portfolio is complete without a nice mech or two. Okay, actually it seems like no Lego portfolio of late is complete without a crappy Halo MOC...buuuuuut, anyway...After taking a short breather from the last creation (I'm not EVEN going to say it's name!!!!) I decided to try putting something together with what little parts were left to me - all three of them. I also promised myself, mostly due to a hefty work schedule, that it would be done just over the weekend. A refreshing approach given the last one took nine months. The end result was not a masterpiece by any stretch of the imagination, but for a weekend's worth of work, I at least felt like it was good enough for posting.
I should mention the astounding work of Brian Kescenovitz. His creations have been haunting my midnight MOCpages sessions as of late. So in the time honored tradition of passing the buck, I suggest you place full blame for this...this...THING on him. Oh, I didn't want to do it! No sir! Huh-uh! But his work is so stinkin' brilliant that after every nightly pilgrimage to the holy land (aka Mondaynoodles Lego Pages), I'd stagger from the computer, glassy-eyed and pale, over to the Legos mindlessly chanting Must...build...mecha! MUST...BUILD...MECHA!!
So anyway, here's my first shot at a walker. Bear in mind I'm not really sure what defines a Mech walker. But this version is complete with big-manly-type guns, missles, a flame thrower, magnetic shield generator (for days when you need that exta protection), and a hot chick "controling the action" by (knew I could get that phrase in somewhere!) burning, stomping about, blowing s#* up, and creating general mayhem...
A few of the non-standard features include:- Tri-dimensional balance regulation system - cause nothing's more embarrassing during an invasion than your mech falling on it's face.- Outfacing Magnetic Shield Generator - to keep out those pesky armor piercing rounds, missles, lasers, frap rays, and harsh language.
Other features include:- Def Monkey Audio Sound System with twin 18" subwoofers - how can you pilliage and destroy without your tunes?- Freezur Knutz Brand interior air cooling system - I mean, who wants to wreak havoc with sweaty pits?
Possible bumper stickers: "Chaos. Panic. Disorder. My work here is done" "Keep Honking: I'm reloading""Guns don't kill people, Lego Mechs do""I still miss my ex...but my aim is getting better" "Student Driver" "My other ride is your Mom"
Ssssnnnnfffffffff...aah! Still has that new Mech smell.
I kind of like this section. I put a big 'ol honkin flame thrower on the nose of the cockpit. I thinks it's a cool feature, but ya just don't want to be within a hundred feet of that sucker if he sneezes!
The obligatory Mech weaponry.
My kind of gal! (except for the part where she's 2 inches tall and made of plastic.)
Q & A:
Q: Ngeok asked - "It looks quite sweet but I'm wondering if it can walk, if the 'toes' move (for uneven terrain), and why the back looks so exposed. Still, it would make a nice addition to the battlefield."
A. It does have walking capacity, and yes, the toes move. The Outfacing Gravitational Field Generator provides protection against assault. The result is a Mech that no longer needs heavy armor plating, providing greater speed and manuverability. The field adjusts to surface terrain and moves with the Mech, while being strong enough to where it is sometimes used as a weapon itself, crushing enemies, smashing through barriers, and cracking Brazil Nuts.