The Flesh Tone Wars . Read about the wild Flesh Tone Wars and the amazing machines used in them! .
The year was 2036 A.D. and General Schnikelheimer of the Chek Republic was rising to dictatorial power. The nearby nation of Islandasia was unconcerned. That is, until April 19.
General Schnikelheimer was a humanifig – that is, part human-flesh-colored and part yellow-colored. His father was a regular minifigure but his mother was a flesh-tone minifigure. “Fleshies” were very much despised in the nations of Islandasia and Chek during this time in history. Unfortunately, this racial prejudice led to the most horrific set of military emergencies in Islandasia’s modern history, dubbed the Flesh Tone Wars.
On April 5, 2036, General Simon Schnikelheimer took the Chek throne after a coup d’état carried out by his brother, Carson Schnikelheimer. Carson had died during the three-month civil war and Simon took the opportunity to place himself in the much-coveted position as King of the Chek Republic. Once in office, with the military behind him, he silenced all competition and restored the kingdom to peace . . . for a while. It wasn’t long before word got out that the new King was a humanifig. This upset the Chek population very much.
Below: General Schnikelheimer with one of his Chaos Creator army droids
This news also reached Islandasia. People began making fun of the Chek political instability as a result of racial differentiation. The real trouble began when Islandasia placed an embargo on commercial trade with Chek. When asked why, the Islandasia government said this was on the basis of Chek having political instability. King Schnikelheimer, however, twisted the truth and made it look like Islandasia was stopping trade as a result of his personal racial background. Schnikelheimer had this news publicized all across Chek and soon the whole population was angry at Islandasia. They forgot their own lunacy and started pointing fingers at their neighbor.
Islandasia took all this rather offensively. They immediately enforced their impediment of any relations with Chek. On April 13, an emergency bill was passed in Islandasia to have all Chek residents removed from the country. A massive upheaval of peace within communities occurred as Checks were forcefully extricated from their homes. Riots erupted in the streets as violence and looting grew.
But nobody expected what happened next . . . on April 19.
At 6:00 A.M., the Chek Royal Forces invaded the southwestern part of Islandasia’s main island by boat and air, bombing the large metropolis of Afergan. Within one hour, the city in its entirety was in shambles and the nearby military base – Fort Kurna – in confusion. The Chek forces moved past the coastline conurbations into the fields and forests of central-eastern Islandasia.
When news of this catastrophe reached the capital of Bricksburg, the entire government was set to shock. President Michael Harrison had a stroke and had to be rushed to the Bricksburg High Medical Center. Though much more powerful, Islandasia was quickly distressed and called a national emergency. Check guerilla forces were romping through community after community, ransacking everything and killing everyone in sight. They were a deadly, dangerous group of mercenaries.
The military was ordered to send out half – that is, eight – of its immense long-distance bombers from Base Gray Tent (the main military base of Islandasia hidden deep within the Islandasia Desert) to keep Chek from sending any more troops and supplies across the sea. Emergency aid was immediately deployed to the now-ravaged Afergan. Nonetheless, Islandasia was not in very good condition. Its military was weak and unprepared. It was not ready to counter hard-to-find killers within its own borders.
It was time to re-design Islandasia’s military. And that’s exactly what it would do.
Below: mass-producing military vehicles and supplies at one of sixteen impromptu factories in northern Islandasia
Islandasia troops getting geared up
Though this is past history and the machinery created is not very impressive in our eyes, the Islandasia Military branch must be commended on its amazing and successful endeavor to design, produce, and deploy all-new military equipment, technology, and forces to the field within seven days. It was rumored that Chek was readying itself for an all-out war; already its commercial airports had been deviously transformed into air bases packed full with bombers and fighter jets. The Machiavellian Schnikelheimer and his evil plans were flourishing.
The Cormorant Dropship
The Cormorant is a very light and versatile transport aircraft. With specially-designed turbo engines and retractable wings, it has the ability to land on a very short runway. Though it cannot land and take off directly vertically or hover in mid-air, it only needs a runway of 100 studs in length. It can transport eight troops, including one pilot, or a great variety of machinery and equipment. It was used on missions ranging from zoo evacuations (carrying animals by winch) on the eve of tropical storms to transporting the president of Islandasia to and from military bases.
The Cormorant was designed and built by NAIA, the National Aerospace Intelligence Agency of Islandasia.
The Cormorant is equipped with two rotary machine guns on the front and a number of other small self-defense weapons all around the fuselage. The airframe is specifically designed for swift flights at high altitudes. There are two hatchback openings, one on each side of the fuselage. The cockpit windshield can be opened in the event of an emergency pilot ejection. Perhaps the most unique aspect of the Cormorant is its wings; they have the ability to open horizontally in-flight and then retract upon landing to conserve airfield space. Instead of two stabilizer wings and a vertical tail, the Cormorant employs a V-tail configuration for increased efficiency and in-flight maneuverability. The Cormorant is almost as versatile as helicopter and quite a bit faster than one as well. It uses two turbine engines as power plants.
The Cormorant only needs one pilot to be operated; even then, it can fly and land itself on autopilot mode. If the pilot becomes unconscious due to close-combat incidents, the cockpit is equipped with an autopilot-reinstatement mechanism. By detecting heartbeat and brain activity, the machine can be warned when the pilot is unconscious. In such an event, the APRM performs CRS on the pilot while the main autopilot computers kick into gear and fly the airplane.
The Cormorant, though small, is very sleek and has been used in almost any kind of operation imaginable.
Below: a gray-winged Cormorant sitting at Fort Sumerkan in the Islandasia Western Plains. Most of the Cormorants in Islandasia’s military force are stationed at Fort Sumerkan.
During the Flesh Tone Wars, more than fifty Cormorants were designed and built over a period of three months and sent into action. Without them, Islandasia would have undoubtedly suffered during their military endeavors. Three cheers to the Cormorant, now peacefully retired and due to be superseded by the larger NAIA Graywolf.
Fun Fact: The Islandasia military used to prefer Cormorant pilots to be women, as the original seatbelt configuration utilized an innovative under-leg strap that was reported to be highly uncomfortable for men. This was changed when an ex-pilot sued NAIA upon retiring and discovering he had become sterile.
The Stalker Droid
One of the most cunning and coveted creations developed during the Flesh Tone Wars was the Stalker Droid. The very simple and straightforward design allowed more than three hundred droids to be produced. Despite its simplicity, the Stalker Droid was efficient, practical, and meant serious business. Programmed to destroy enemy minifigures and annihilate enemy machines, the Stalker Droid lives up to its name: it’s stealthy and dangerously swift in its operations. It’s very versatile, fast, and has been designed to be able to operate in all kinds of weather: from cold arctic wastelands to hot deserts to marshland.
Below: A Stalker Droid operating in the Great Islandasia Desert, an environment that even the most manly minifigure army men find unbearable and typical machinery get stuck in the sand . . . or melt.
The Stalker Droid is not big . . . but this is to its advantage. It can weave through a chaotic battlefield filled with troops and bulky vehicles with ease and get its business done in a jiffy. These droids were most successfully used in surprise attacks on enemy camps. They enemy would hardly even realize what was going on before the droids had slipped behind enemy lines, ran through the camp creating mayhem, and were gone again.
These droids often operate on their own – that is, using their own pre-programmed computer minds – but in test operations and more serious undertakings, they can also be maneuvered at bases and mobile transport devices alike up to a hundred miles away.
The Stalker Droid, besides its imposing looks, is especially dangerous considering its rapid-fire canon mounted on the front of its “head” like a nose and can be moved up and down, side to side. There are also two mini machine guns, one on each side of the body that can rotate in any direction. These droids use two laser eyes that can see in 180 degrees, similar to the eyes of a chameleon.
Though not as sturdy and impressive as other mechs you may have seen, the Stalker Droid played its role in the Flesh Tone Wars. They were the first to be deployed to counter the Check guerilla fighters in western Islandasia, and drove the terrified mercenaries all the way to Islandasia’s east coast where a final showdown at Port Hill, a major coastal city, took place.
Fun Fact: Islandasia military troops undergo strenuous psychology tests to ensure they do not become disturbed or overwhelmed by the seemingly sentient mechs they will frequently encounter on the battlefield.
The Super Apache
Perhaps the most impressive and successful Islandasian military creation during the Flesh Tone Wars era was the NAIA Super Apache. Named after its resemblance to Earth’s Apache assault helicopter, this raptor-like air attack vehicle is sleek, sexy, and dangerous. Designed for high-speed flight and crazy-awesome maneuverability, it has been used in countless operations across the Lego world of Mikrosheison. It, like the real Apache, is configured to be operated by two pilots, one in front of the other. Together, they fly the airplane, gun down the enemy, and look manly.
The helicopter itself, of course, is manly. But it is also sexy with a sleek design, hefty assets, and big guns (jokes intended). By looking at an underside shot, we can see a small canon underneath the cockpit and an impressive selection of canons, rapid-fire machine guns, and missile launchers on each side of the airframe. The landing gear is retractable as this helicopter can fly at very high speeds at high altitudes.
From the nose to the tail, this thing is sleek as can be. The two “bulbs” on the nose are radar extensions, allowing the pilots to communicate with other units and bases as well as detect other machines in the air, analyze outside weather conditions, etc.
The back end was painstakingly designed to give the Apache the best in-air performance imaginable.
You may be wondering why this aircraft has “MMF” insignia. Well, it just so happens that the Islandasia military forces were called the MMF (Mikrosheise Minifig Forces) during the Flesh Tone wars. They have since been renamed the IMF (Islandasia Military Forces).
It takes a lot of training to become a pilot of a Super Apache, but it’s so much more than worth it!
Below: Super Apache Unit 46 operating over the jungles of Peruvia in the southern part of the world of Mikrosheison.
Fun Fact: A Super Apache was used in one of the greatest rescue stories of the century when a small biplane flying over Bricksburg began to malfunction. Two Super Apaches were sent out to, while flying parallel with the plane, rescue the pilot. The operation was, amazingly, successful and the pilot was rescued by hopping out of the biplane onto a special platform attached to one of the Super Apaches. The biplane crashed a safe distance from the metropolitan areas of Bricksburg with no reported injuries on the ground.
Islandasia and most of the countries in Mikrosheison have not yet been able to develop inter-planetary transporation, so things like helicopters and ordinary airplanes are still impressive for us. Thanks to stuff like the Super Apache, Islandasia was able to drive the Chek forces back to their dominion once and for all. The Flesh Tone War is actually called “wars” in the plural form because scuffles and scandals continued for years afterward. Nonetheless, King Schnikelheimer was found dead in his palace bathroom the morning of February 2, 2040 after tragically slipping on a bar of soap and cracking his head open on the gold-plated toilet seat. What a pathetic way for a world-domination-seeking dictator to die, I suppose.
Now, fifty years later, commercial trade has re-opened between Islandasia and Chek now that Chek has declared itself a democratic republic.
Thus, the epic recounts of the Flesh Tone Wars come to an anticlimactic end.
Until we tell you that King Schikelheimer secretly bore a son who made his escape off of Chek at the age of seven and is hiding in a secret underwater laboratory built by his Uncle Ludicrock off the coast of White Rock Island in the Diamond Sea.
But that’s another story.
These creations are actually several years old. To visit more cool archive military creations, visit this page.