Jedi Order: Log 14 - We lost Cato Nemoidia to the Sith and our capital ship need spare parts to make it back to Tython so we have landed on Raxus Prime. The Sith must of followed us here. We must defend the ship on the surface.
Padawans: Fight in the Junkyards.
The Jedi are trying to fend off the attacking Sith.
While this was going on, Dave and his friend Dick were behind pile the tires.
Dave: What should we do?
Dick: We have to help them!
Dave: But we've never done anything like this, we hardly are able to use are lightsabers that our Master left us with before he left a year ago!
Dick: What about the droids we made?
Dave: I don't know, we'd have to activate them with that button, but they are battling there!
Dick: We have to try!
Dave: Alright, let's go!
But the Jedi were starting to lose the battle.
Yojai (the jedi): It's too much!
Hurff (the other jedi): I can't shake them!
Dave and Dick bounced down the mound of tires toward the button.
Dave: We made it!
Dick: Hit it!
The droids came to life.
Yojai was knocked down and dropped his lightsaber. But then...
...Hurff threw his lightsaber at one of the Sith and nipped the Sith's hand.
This allowed Yojai to jump up just in time to defend himself against his attackers.
Then Dave and Dick used the force on an old battery and flung it towards Yojai's attackers.
WHACK! The battery knocked down Yojai's foes, allowing him to turn his attention towards the other Sith.
But then one of the other Sith used the force to collapse the tire pile!
Yojai: Surrender you Sith!
But the droids now seemed to the Sith to emerge from the rubble. They started firing at the Sith.
The Sith who had been hit with the battery now regained themselves.
But the other Sith was alone fighting the droids; they were too much for him.
Yojai force-pushed a Sith into the tires.
The tide turned, and the Jedi were winning.
One Sith ran away, while the other got immobilized by the droids.
Dave: Let's chase him!
Yojai: No, let him go, we have a lot to do here. We can take these fallen Sith to the ship and learn more about their plans. Besides, the other jedi may need our help. Who are you anyway? I haven't seen you anywhere.
Dick: It's a long story.
Dave: Let's see if any other Jedi need help!
Yojai: After we help our friend here, then we'll put these three Sith in that pod over there.
Dave: Let's get to work!
so, you re the guy who made this, it has the same problem as the story, the ground colors, messy, while in a strategic point of view a scrap yard is good, visually, like the other guy said, we need a visual break, a clean battle spot, you did nt do that, about half the post, our eyes are tired, and our brain revolts, you need to make clean corridors or room next time, you cover the rest easily, concentrate on a clean scene, you ll see results!
Quoting David .
You can just post it here if you like :D
Ok, here it is. Put what you want "fired-up" where I have Fire Ninja Jedi. Let me know if it works! <span style="text-shadow: 0 0 4px #00CC00, 0 -5px 4px #FFFF33, 2px -10px 6px #FFDD33, -2px -15px 11px #FF8800, 2px -25px 18px #FF2200;"><font color=#00CC00>
Fire Ninja Jedi</font></span></font></span>
I agree with David Alexander Smith. :) I think though that with something like a Junkyard and Lego, it needs to be a little more organized. A bit of a contradiction, but when you think about it closely, it makes sence. You have them fighting in the junk, but there are no patches where we can clearly see them more esily. If there were mounds of junk with bits in between, it may work more. I'm thinking of something similar to Lotho Minor from The Clone Wars as visual references.