"Alright, how's everybody? Good, good, good. Now, as your father probably told you, my name is Matt Foley and I am a motivational speaker. Now let's get started by letting me give you a little bit of a scenario of what my life is all about. First off, I am thirty-five years old. I am divorced. And I live in a van down by the river! Now you kids are probably saying to yourselves 'hey, I'm gonna go out and I'm gonna get the world by the tail, and wrap it around, and pull it down and put it in my pocket!" Well, I'm here to tell you that you're probably gonna find out, as you go out there, that you're not gonna amount to jack-squat!"
This is probably my favorite SNL skit ever - Chris Farley as "Matt Foley" the motivational speaker. This was a quick CubeDude, it took about an hour - just to get the creative juices a-flowin!