"A zombie messing with my private time? Damn, good job i've got my lucky chainsaw and sawn-off with me"
"And stay down undead. Now where did that stripper go..."
"Orcs and a troll? Aw hell no. Grab up a claymore and deal with this."
"Going to need to see a troll proctologist to get him out of there. Any other business?"
"Hmm, luckily I never leave home without my katana"
"Thirsty work slaughtering assasins. Now, time to ... Stormtroopers! What kind of messed up....."
"Still, just activate my bling-sabre and pimp-slap them about.... Sure it's got a red blade, you know i'm on the darkside!"
"Well, anything else while i'm dismembering things?"
"Now THIS is just ridiculous"
"Stu! What are you doing here?"
"Nev, didn't you find it odd that your pimptacular fantasy involved ever-more wild battles against fantasy enemies? And that you always had a suitable weapon to hand? You must be asleep in Oz while i'm daydreaming in Derby with my enormous mental powers switched on"
"Thats some messed up shizzle brother"
"If this is a dream, just be thankful it's not going like this"
"Dude, that is SO wrong"
"Cheers man, so how should we celebrate?"
'Aww, do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight.....'
Happy birthday brother. Lots of love to you and Becs and I hope life is good on the other side of the planet.
(To anybody else viewing, Nev is one of my oldest and dearest friends, my best man and a bloody good guy. He also lives in Australia right now so I see him maybe once a year. He's not a FOL but i'm sending him a link to this as a birthday gift/ card.)